South Sudan Journal, Parts 24 & 25 (of 29)

Message #24 April 21, 2004


Hello Mom and Dad.

Well it is early in the morning. The sun is just thinking of rising, and I am up to start the day. It is a wonderful temperature right now, after a full night of cooling off. Unfortunately, I don't think it will stay this cool.

We have been back in Lankien for almost one week now. It seems that this place is very dynamic, and only those with open minds and flexible will survive. "Where is so-and-so?" "They ran away to Malakal, because of security." "Well who can do his job?" "This person, but their English isn't that good." "Malesh, we'll take him anyway." (Malesh: Arabic for "Sorry," because of a situation just is. "Your compound just burned down, Malesh" or "we just don't have any more food for you, Malesh.")

Our office is now in a large (trigano) tent, since it was lost in the fire. Further, all our stores are now kept in the one remaining storeroom structure. All other expat stores are spread around into the remaining expat tukels, and we are mostly sleeping outside these days. (Fortunately the rains and mosquitoes haven't come yet.)

In the first few days here, there was a busy time getting the compound up and running, transforming a pile of bags, into a livable compound. Fortunately for me, all my begging for more logistical assistance has yielded Charlie T, and Omari (two Kenyan men with many years experience in this project and country). They are great to have around, working with the staff and repairing/building most things.

The antenna mast was raised, solar panels laid out and wired up, latrines opened and loaded with paper, mattresses pulled out for sleeping, and water filters brought into service. There was a lot of washing to do by the cleaning ladies we have here too. All in all, slowly slowly, things came together.

----

Wow, the first raindrops are falling on the tent. It hasn't rained here in 6 months, but there has been a lot of talk of the coming rains, and here they are... We have two planes coming today, trying to load ourselves up with food before the proper rainy season; I hope the rain holds off. Apparently, with a 5-minute good rain, the airstrip is unlandable for days.

Due to the recent insecurity between the clans, WFP has stayed away, and not delivered our patient food. We have been struggling to provide enough to our patients, but with the numbers we have now, we are having a hard time. With 170 TB patients and 80 Kala Azar patients, we use about 3 tons of food per week. The plane we use gives us 2.5 tons a flight, but that is usually shared with logistic items and expats too. We had a large buffer, for such an event, but with the looting during the fire, and the fire itself, we lost a lot of that. Now, we occasionally cut rations on different items, as we run low or out of them. Right now we have 12 bags of maize left. We use 35 in one week, this plane is important to us. The clouds are staying dark, as the sun rises off the horizon in the east. Like everything else here, we'll see what happens.

-----------------

April 20, 2004, 2335.

Got caught in a conversation with Evert, regarding the weather. "Should we call the plane off?" "I'd rather not, the patients can really use the food." I replied. "Do we 'need' the food?" "What do you mean by need? Part of the ration is cut already, and we give bugger all to begin with, I'd say they 'need' the food more than I've ever needed anything in my life, but that goes the same for a good day too."

It is a tricky thing, this calculation one does as the storm clouds are coming, and so is the plane. This plane costs $1,100 USD per hour, taking two hours to get here, and two hours back. By bringing the plane, then having it not land, is a pricey thing. By calling it off and waiting for sunny weather, has its personal drawbacks, mostly some hungry looks from the patients. It is a difficult situation to remain unbiased in. To add to it, a lot of our fences are now much more transparent after the fire and quick reconstruction; and thus our luxury tinned meals can be viewed by many. We try to eat inside as much as possible, but with the heat it is hard all the time.

"Should we call it off?" "No, I think it is going slightly off to the west, let's wait and see."

And we sat, and we saw the clouds drop a little rain, but mostly move on to the west. The plane came, and the next one too. The next day I walked the airstrip with Evert, to get another lesson in airstrip maintenance before he left, end of mission. In the dried dirt were the tire marks of the plane taking off, from the day before; frozen as a reminder of the coming rains and mud. Everyone is talking of the rains, "do this before the rains come," "that's nothing, wait till the rains come," "rain, you don't know rain Kawaja!" I may be a Kawaja, (stupid white guy) but I get the sense that these rains are impressive.

So as I mentioned, I haven't seen rain here for 6 months. There was a sprinkle once when we were out in March, but besides that, nothing. The whole place is dried up. There are some trees with leaves, but few and far between. There is no grass, so the wind kicks up a lot of dust. In fact, I remember areas in the compound where little stubs of wood were just flush with the ground, and now they are 2-3 inches above the ground level. The soil is blowing away. Things are dry, dry, dry and hot! We all have covered our water bottles with cloth to wet, then as the water evapourates, the bottle gets cooler, but it takes less than 20 minutes for a bottle to dry up completely, then they get hot again. Also, in two gulps the 1.5 litre bottle is empty, and you have to start cooling again. Sometimes this is too much.

I don't know how hot it is, (our thermometers were lost in the fire, but we are getting more up on Saturday, I'll tell you later.), but by 1200 the sun is cooking, and by 1400, even lying in the shade in a breeze it is too much. Work usually goes from 0800 to 1200, then 1600 till night. 1200 to 1600 is just not a good time to be caught in the sun, let alone be caught doing anything active like lying down breathing.

The flies somehow are not influenced by the heat, and they have a fun time flying around everything, and everyone.

Fortunately the mosquitoes are not active yet. We are all sleeping outside and under the stars these days. It is just too hot in the tukels.

-----

I wanted to comment on a couple news events you raised. I hear Sri Lanka has slipped back to war. I haven't heard much about this, but have been listening to the BBC most nights, without any news on it. I guess with the Middle East, Iraq, the European Constitution, US elections and the court case of Michael Jackson, a little Island civil war can go unmentioned. I can believe it though, there is much reconciliation to be had, and people's patience can only go so far. I would not give up on it yet, this may be a little burst of frustration at the delayed peace agreement, and cooler heads may still prevail.

Then there is Sudan in the news too. Of the many many issues in Sudan, two are in the news. Darfur, the Western portion of Sudan, is considered the worst humanitarian crisis of the world right now. Haven't heard yet? Well there aren't too many westerners living there, and we don't get our oil from there yet, so it usually takes the back pages. Reports that we are getting are pretty grim. "1 Million people displaced by the fighting," "...Around 10,000 people are also believed to have died in more than a year of fighting, which started with a rebel revolt against the government amid allegations it had backed the militias and was neglecting the Darfur region."

This is an interesting situation. On the 10-year anniversary of the Rawandan genocide, the international community after saying "never again" is faced with a similar situation, and now is pressed to put actions to words. They have been refused access into the area, and are now waiting. These next weeks will be good to watch, and see what happens, this could be another Rawanda.

That conflict is between the government, government backed militias and local rebel forces in the west of Sudan. This is not related to the cease-fire between the SPLA and the Government. A little geography lesson... Sudan is a very large country, the size of continental Europe. A conflict in the west does not influence the conflict in the South, where I work. (Though it has similar aspects.) South Sudan (represented by the Sudanese People's Liberation Army, SPLA,) is currently in peace negotiations with the Sudan Government, regarding power sharing of the land in the South. And this is the second news issue I heard on the BBC.

Last night, we heard a UN security person discussing a humanitarian crisis in the Upper Nile Region of Sudan that is where I work. (Well, it is also a large area, and I am removed from this issue, but maybe I should explain.)

The Government uses militias for some of its fighting. During this cease-fire, small operations were carried out by militias against the SPLA. It is a useful tool, if you want to ensure your forces do not violate the cease-fire. Also, sometimes these militias are independent from the government, and claim land for themselves.

North of Malakal, a militia commander defected to the SPLA, and some other militia commanders did not like the switch, and fighting broke out. This fighting had led to people fleeing the area. This fighting has been reported to spread around Malakal, and cause up to 50,000 people to flee. Talking to a pilot in Loki who flies up there with a monitoring team (monitoring the cease-fire) he reported seeing much of what was reported on the BBC, but he told me about it two weeks ago.

The militias are more active in the South these days too. There is a rise in tensions with the delay in the signing of the peace agreement. The agreement was suppose to be signed in December, January, and now April 21st is the new deadline. The US has been pushing hard for the signing, and now has said sanctions will be imposed if they miss the 21st of April deadline. It is the 20th and we just heard the negotiator for the Government went back to Khartoum. I think the US will start the sanctions.

How this affects us here in Lankien, not really. Darfur is a many hundreds of miles away, and with different people fighting a different war. The militia movements and holding off on the peace agreement is a little more related to us. However, MSF has been here in Lankien since 1996, when the war was going strong. It hasn't come to that yet, but there is just a lot of talk of the peace agreement not being signed.

But, when I look around, and listen to the news, I feel more secure here. Madrid bombing, terrorist plots found in the UK, SARS, etc etc, there is more apparent risk here, but nothing too complicated or impersonal. In the clan insecurity lately, one person was killed, then all the (male) family of the killer fled. Everyone else stayed, almost fearless. We left too, but people almost laughed at us, "it is safe for you, this is not your problem." I actually believe them.

Well, it is late, and much to do tomorrow. Things are well here, and slowly, ever so slowly coming together again.

Good to be here, though this is the hardest thing I have done in a long time.

Lots of love,

Steve
P.S. I'm thinking of taking my next vacation in Sunny Toronto for 2.5 weeks in June/July. Does anyone know of a good travel agent, or flight deal?
Message #25 May 15, 2004


Hello Mom and Dad
Well, it is May, already. Back home, there must be warm days to fully bring everyone out of winter, and rain showers to grow summer plants everywhere. The same here. Winter wasn't cold at all, but the sun shines here and brings us out of any cold we thought we had, and the rains are starting.
I think it was around the 20th of April I last reported back on things here. Things are generally well, where reviewed... There have been some minor issues and some health problems I've had, but all in all , things are fine. First, the project. Kala Azar numbers are down to 50 patients! This is good stuff, but it is only following trends over the last few years. KA dips down May, June and July, then starts a steep climb in August and September, back up to the large numbers like the 250 I experienced when I first got here. The fewer numbers means less staff, and less work, in the KA clinic. However, TB numbers have steadily climbed and are not following any annual trend, as it is a different type of disease. With the numbers as they are, we still have large demands on our food supplies, and the coming heavy rains are telling us it is important to stock up, as best we can.The reconstruction of the compound is going slowly. We are currently on a "holding" operation, where we are not to build anything other than essential things, e.g. lab, office, latrines, morgue, fence, nothing else. This is because we still have some grievences with the community, even though they don't see anything wrong with the situation. That situation being... during the fire we were heavily looted, we cannot lay off staff that have run away and therefore not working with us, we are constantly finding people stealing things, and the local authorities reply to all these things as, "Well pay these people that have left. Their families are still suffering. Just get another plane and bring more things."
The latest bout of this sort of thing happened, just as Evert, our PC, left for some vacation and I was team leader again. Lindsay, (a nurse here) found some food and cooking oil, tucked away in a trunk. We found out who separated that food from the patient food supply, and this person even said she hid it, but for security reasons. We hardly ever catch someone stealing something, though many things get taken, so this was a golden opportunity to try to stop things. Unfortunately, after hours of talking with the staff, and the local authorities (who are involved with all staff issues), we gained no ground. "This lady was only separating the food and hiding it, for security, she was not stealing it." "But why was the 200 kgs of food just next to it safe, and not that 5kgs?" "You are not from here, you cannot understand how some things are secure and other things not secure. Have you ever tried guarding cows or goats?" "Err, ahh, no." "Then you cannot understand how she was securing this food from stealing." That is right, I don't understand.
The next day, I went to the airstrip to greet a plane, and I found jerrycans for water, clearly writen "MSF" walking away from the compound. Quickly I found someone to translate. "You cannot take those!" "I'm just using them." "I know you are using them, they are not for your use. How did you get them out of the compound?" "Issac gave them to me." "They are not Issac's, he cannot give away MSF property." "You can buy them back if you want them so badly." "If you bring them back, that will help me not fire Issac. I'm leaving now." "If you fire Issac, can I keep this jerrycan?"...
I wanted to see how MSF property could leave the compound, so I returned to the clinic. "Where's the guard?" "He went away." "But he is the guard, he cannot just leave." "But he had to eat, you cannot live without eating." "True, thank you, I forgot about that one. But wait, that is why we have TWO guards, so one can eat, and the other will guard." "They do that, but then the other guard got hungry too." "The first one should come back to replace the other one." "But he didn't feel it was important to just sit here and do nothing." "Get the guard please." "Do you want them to not eat? You cannot live without eating..."
The next day, we uncovered a large, somewhat organized drug theft that had been happening while we were away, and continued now even after our return. Unfortunately, much bigger than a jerrycan, and as such, much more talking in circles for hours. "I didn't take any. I have to tell the truth, since you are asking me, but if people do not believe me, I will slaughter a goat in front of everyone to show my innocence." "I'll have to try that one back home." (I thought)...
I extended my contract, to understand more about this place, the culture, and the games that are played. Right now, I am understanding it more and more. I understand that this is a game that has been played for decades, since the first Kawaga (white folk) came here and lost the first round; I'm just one in a long line of Kawagas that have come, full of energy to play the game, and like the others I have given my all, and I have started losing, until I hand over the game to someone else and return home for a rest.

I like the stories of sailors returning to their home port, battered by the latest storm, the storm of the decade. They claim victory in a chant, "We fought the sea and look, we are here, we are alive, we won!" But they forgot something, they limped home under the power of their remaining piece of canvas, pumping the bilge through the night and hungry, longing for cooked meals. The sea is unchanged though. Maybe in a calm, it is licking its wounds, but the next low pressure cell to pass its tempest calm will stir it to full fury, an energy the victorious sailors could not muster in the least. Victory is something for the ones that stay behind to play the game again.
Lankien, and maybe Sudan in general, is the sea; a harsh environment, calm in parts, but can be thrown into a fury to burn out Kawajas quickly, or maybe just the regular waves can wear them over time. Sudan will remain here long after I and many other Kawajas leave.
During the discoveries of the thefts, my health started coming down a notch. I agree that illness, or disease, is a "not at ease, or dis-ease" state of the whole person. I was not at ease at the time, and it was well reflected by my symptoms. I started getting some sort of multiple bites at night by odd bugs, my movements assumed all sorts of irregularities, I developed a slight fever, headaches, and nausia, and one night as I pulled my bed outside to cool off the fever, a scorpion stung me on the finger. I was sleeping at night (except for the scorpion night) and mostly through the afternoons, but no improvements. I was at an all time health low. (Note: If you want to get rid of a headache, find a scorpion and get stung. There is a renewed health presence and clarity of mind brought on, along with some pain. Overall it is not recommended, but it's a good humbling experience.)
The plane we usually use just hit a bird in Western Upper Nile, and was going to be out for a couple weeks for repairs, however, it could drop by Lankien one last time, to medevac Lindsay (she had even worse headaches and fevers) and myself, and so it did. We headed to Nairobi and to a hospital for some tests and R&R/sick leave.
Just being in Nairobi for a week, eating good food and resting oh so much, in a cool atmosphere was just what was needed. I got some work done on some orders for more rebuilding and restocking, and besides that, just rested.
A week later, by the 9th of May, I was in great shape and was to fly back to Lankien. This time the plane (a different one) had to do a round trip, to all the project sites before Lankien. This was an exciting trip, as with the last 15-20 odd trips I have done to, from and around Lankien, I have only seen Lankien, and some space in between.
Starting out by 0800, we left Loki for Kerker, in the Nuba mountains. We climbed through rain clouds then above to clear skies. We were in a Aero Commander, a little 1100kg carrying capacity plane that beats our usual Casa on speed, comfort and visibility (it has windows all around, plus I was sitting in the other front seat.) An hour and a half after taking off, we passed over Lankien (24,000 feet), straight on the route to the Nuba Mountains where we could identify it by the plane permanently "parked" at the end of the airstrip (and the GPS told us it was Lankien too.) A little while later, after dodging building storm clouds, we were passing the Nile River. Wow, I hadn't passed the Nile, close enough to see it before.
The Nile, what a mystery, what a wonder, what a source of so many stories and adventures. "Nelson's battle at the Nile." "Egyptian legends, on the Nile." "SPLA fighting over the Upper Nile regions" etc., etc. There it was, still with water in it, for a mighty river like The Nile, cannot be seasonal, of course there was water! I stayed staring at it for the 30 minutes as we passed it, noting its different fingers and meanders. Is it the, "Graceful Nile," the "Abundant Nile," or is there a "Tempest Nile," down there too.
As we flew further north, hills started to appear. WHAT? Sudan has hills. We must be in Egypt. No, it is the Nuba Mountains. I bet if you spend your life walking on the flat plains of the south, these are Mountains. We lowered down and made our approach to, "Hey Paul, where are we landing, I don't see an airstrip?" "It's right there, just around the corner." And sure enough, we cruised alongside this hill for a bit, bumping along the turbulance, and an airstrip appeared. A few seconds later, we graced over the strip to inspect it and clear off the goats. We touched down, off loaded cargo, met other MSF team members, loaded gear and were off again, for it would be a long day, and no time to spare. We took off, uphill, and even climbed over this hill, just like the movies. "Don't you think we are a little low, Paul?" I questioned, as we were climbing over the hill, but really just maintaining our 20-30 feet of height. "I should hope not." Well, he probably notices too. Maybe I'll leave the flying to him, I resolved.
WE MADE IT! After I said my comment, I noticed that things were alright, and by sitting still, this problem (as with other problems) just went away, and I continued to have a great ride.
We headed south again, but a little more to the west, heading to Western Upper Nile. There was the Nile again, magestic in the mid-day sun. To the north of it, there was a weird grid pattern, stretching over many square kilometers and another one to the south. This is either a sign from Aliens (one Mother of all crop circles, but square), or ??? "Hey Paul, what is that?" "That is an oil field." Or I guess it could be that too, an Alien crop, a square grid in the sand, disguised as an oil field.
There is lots of oil in South Sudan, in fact that is one of the driving forces behind the war. (No they weren't all fighting over their rights to dust and other nothings.) This oil field was a large expanse of order, in an otherwise widespread area of nothing. There were roads that stretched forever (apparently these are year round roads, a technology that hasn't even hit parts of Kenya). Also, there was an airstrip, comparable to the one in Loki. I had heard of many "defensive" aircraft in these oil fields, used to "clear" the lands around the field of any enemies. I have heard stories from some of our staff of attacks on nearby villages, where there were no soldiers, just people living. Their only fault being that they lived on the land that the Northerns (and western oil companies) wanted to extract oil from. As I saw that airstrip, I didn't like it. This technologically advanced money making field was only an hour flight from Lankien, where people are dying of the simplest of illnesses, and cannot supply enough water or food to live the most basic existence. I hated that place, though the engineer in me was admiring its construction. That is a good way to extract oil from a field. I just don't agree with what it is, and what it takes away from the people.
We continued south west, into Western Upper Nile. Wow, palm trees and rivers. I like palm trees and rivers. Why don't we get some palm trees and rivers in Lankien? ("Change what you can, leave what you can't and know the difference." Steve, stay focused, leave the palm trees...) And so we guided into Kuoch, Leer, Mapel, Thanyang, and finally Lankien. Maybe my biased eyes saw Lankien as the emptiest place, void of trees, rivers, cars, tin roofs, helpful communities, etc, I hoped it was just a bias. I emptied myself out of the plane one final time (this travel, even with the excitment of it, is tiring), and greeted the team. It is nice to come home, even though there is a heat and dust that overcomes you as you walk the path back to the compound.
There are people that greet me, "Ah Steve, you come back." "Yes, I come back." "Thank you for your coming. God has blessed us by your pressence." "Your welcome. That's very nice to hear. Thank you." "Now you give me apen?" "Welcome me home, Steve." Indeed. Good to see things haven't changed.
There are always some children to hold your hand as you walk to the compound. That's nice, just remember to wash your hands. Good golly that kid is dirty!
Back in the compound, it was Sunday. People were resting, reading, doing small reports, and generally taking it slow. Jan, our new PC was there. I worked with Jan in Sri Lanka, and it was great to have him here, he is very good. The drug stealing thing had increased. A staff member ran away as this investigation started, and the numbers of stolen items increased incredibly. We still cannot lay off someone who has been absent for a month and a half, since "you can't lay someone off if they are not there." "But that is it, she didn't ask for leave, and now she isn't returning." I'm sure the counterpart was thinking, 'do you want to sit for 5 hours and end up paying her out of frustration, or why don't you just pay her family now? I have nothing to do all day, look at me, I sit here all day. I actually look forward to our talks, I like winning. I throw a bunch of ambiguous sidetracks in the conversation ('have you ever herded cows or goats, HA, I really love that one!') and after 1-2 hours usually I get my way. Would you like to play a round today, you look busy though?') Anyway, the place didn't change when I was out.
The other frustration, is the weather. It is starting to rain now, and flights are changing and shifting around to coordinate with Mother Nature's will. We need the rain to replenish the water supply, but we need dry weather to land more food. Tomorrow we hope to get some planes in, with some more construction material and food, 3500kgs in total. That will be nice, but still that does not bring us close to the stock we want before the rains come, but slowly, slowly.
Around the compound, people are living where they can. Of our expat tukels, most of them double as a store rooms too. I have a bed that I can pull out for hot nights, but for nights that it may rain, I keep it in the office tent (trigano) along with Jan's bed. I have long since given up my modesty when waking up, as the cleaners and labourers start work around me. Some of our fencing is still not there, so there is a clear line of sight from the clinic, and 50 patients, to our compound. Fortunately, no one there cares much about a half dressed Kawaga -- looks pretty much like all the half dressed Sudanese, but white.
The nights now have some biting insects, but very few still. At one point we could sleep without nets, but not now.
The food is still the same, not too interesting. Many days I have entered the canned food store, and resolved that I really wasn't hungry after all. We have a 10 day cycle of the planes, and that helps us with the food. The first day, we get some fresh goat and sukuma wiki (Kenyan type of Spinach), the Kenyans on the team do a nice stewed goat, so that is their turn to cook. The next few nights, we cook pastas with fresh tomatoes and onions, we make avacado dishes and dips, and cabbage meals here and there. By day 5 or so, most o the fresh things are out, either eaten, or turned to wrinkled pieces with little to offer us, so we move on to potatoes, sweet and Irish. After that, the later days of the rotation are the hardest to cook for. We get some chickens quite often, but there are only so many chicken dishes one can make with these little guys. They are mostly bone, with tough "running for their lives to get away from the cats" muscles. Hopefully, we still have eggs, but if not, more pasta and tinned surprises. Soon though, things may change a little.With people returning for planting, there will be some cow beef on the market. Plus, with the rains, we have started to plant some things around the compound. Some eggplant, tomatoes, and I think soon I will plant some papaya trees. Maybe I'll get a palm tree for near the shower, where there is water year round.
I often think that I could quite easily live on a desert island, where I had to provide everything for myself, planning annual crops and livestock etc etc... as long as there was a plane every 10 days to help me with the harder times.
Well, until the day that I am enjoying the sunset on an Island Paradise, I'll enjoy this one. The sun, the sand, the absolutely unique, simple and wonderful people here, the work that, at the end of the day, still means something. It is still a priviledge working with these great people, both International and National, though that may not be reflected by parts of this email. I do feel that I would not want to live here, but it is truly an honor to be here for this time. I also notice I am getting more tired, as I see the fresh and full of energy people come off the plane from time to time, and I reflect how I once looked like that, but I also know I will miss this when I go.
As for plans to come home for a vacation, I'm having a hard time getting a flight for the end of May, so I will continue to look for early June, or maybe have to postpone the visit, until I can visit and stay in September at the end of my time here. We'll see. It is good to hear that things are well in Toronto. I'm sorry to hear the
Leafs didn't continue in the play-offs. I'll finish here, goodnight.
Lots of Love,
Steve